you can't eat that!

I have a confession:

I like FEET.

I like my one mom's feet and I like my other mom's feet. I only like my one mom's armpits (that's my mom with the tasty hair) and I only like my one mom's nose (that's my mom with the comfy lap). But I like the feet of both my moms. I like BOTH FEET of BOTH MY MOMS.

I like the feet of my mom with the comfy lap best when she's been walking around the house all day without any shoes or socks. I like the feet of my mom with the tasty hair best when she has been walking around all day with shoes and socks on.

Sometimes I have to STICK MY HEAD IN MY ONE MOM'S SHOES in order to get my fix. This is what I like best about the feet of my mom with the tasty hair--they fragrance her shoes.

Both my moms catch me playing with my one mom's shoes. Tonight my mom with the tasty hair found me and it was all CAT, WHY ARE YOU SUCKING ON MY SHOELACES? I got a final few slurps in before I was REDIRECTED UP THE STAIRS and that was the end of that.

But unlike plastic bags, shoelaces don't make any noise when I suck on them. Which means that maybe I can get my fix BEFORE MY MOMS EVEN WAKE UP IN THE MORNING and they will never even know. This is an excellent idea, I think, except maybe the shoelace will be soggy and I will be REDIRECTED ONCE AGAIN.

Hm. I shall have to ponder this in the night.

Labels: household items