you can't eat that!

For dinner the other night, my mom with the comfy lap made some lasagna.

It is a well-known fact that CATS LIKE LASAGNA. I hear here is a comic strip about just this very topic, which I would love to read on a regular basis. But I AM NOT ALLOWED NEAR THE NEWSPAPER because inevitably my attempts to READ THE PAPER turn into attempts to EAT THE PAPER, and this is an activity of which my moms do not approve.

My mom with the comfy lap makes some fantastic lasagna. I tried to convince my mom that she should give me a little bit, because after all SHARING IS CARING, but she would have none of that. For a few minutes I sat at her feet and made it quite clear that I was COVETING HER LASAGNA.

I was SUMMARILY IGNORED.

But then the telephone rang, and my mom went off to answer it. It was her own mom. My moms and I very much enjoy talking to our moms, but still I think I have it better because I have TWO MOMS to talk to, whereas they each only have ONE.

My mom with the comfy lap did not realize that her wandering off made for UNATTENDED LASAGNA. Thus I had the perfect opportunity to take my tithe.

I jumped up on the table as quietly as I could, as I know this to be a place where I am NOT ALLOWED. I stopped for a moment to determine whether it was safe to proceed. My mom with the comfy lap was still in the other room, BLISSFULLY UNAWARE of my little sortie.

I intended just to bite off a small piece of noodle, but EXCITEMENT GOT THE BETTER OF ME and I could not stop myself from TAKING THE ENTIRE LAYER. I became somewhat nervous and started to second-guess my ability to complete my mission silently, so I returned to the floor and tried to eat my loot as quickly as I could.

Unfortunately, my mom with the comfy lap heard my hasty slurping. And it was all BAD CAT! CATS DO NOT GET TO SWIPE LASAGNA OFF MY PLATE! and I got bopped on the nose. I ran upstairs to wallow in my guilt, and also to savor the last bits of tomato sauce on my face.

Curses! Foiled again.

Labels: people food