you can't eat that!
8:36 PM Eastern Time
Thursday, November 30, 2006
Substitute moms
My moms went away for A REALLY LONG TIME last week.
My moms assure me that they were not actually gone for that long. My one mom, with the comfy lap, went away for three days, and my other mom, with the tasty hair, went away for three additional days. When I complained about their impending departure (I always know because of the SUITCASES ON THE BED), my moms were all WE ARE GOING TO YOUR GRANDPARENTS' TO EAT TURKEY and WE WILL BE BACK SOON and YOU WILL HAVE LOTS OF FUN VISITORS IN THE MEANTIME.
The part about the turkey bothered me for two reasons. First, I have turkey twice a day, every single day, and I only have to run back and forth between the bedroom and the kitchen a bunch of times for this to occur. I do not have to leave the house to eat turkey, so why would my moms have to leave the house to eat turkey? Second, my mom with the tasty hair DOES NOT EAT MEAT and so why would she leave the house for the express purpose of eating something she won't eat anyway?
I did, however, have lots of fun visitors. Some of my moms' friends came over the first night, and others came over the second night. On the first night it was my moms' friend who has Oreo and a whole bunch of other cats. On the second night it was my moms' friend who has Charlie and Lucy and another friend who has Butterscotch. I don't know Butterscotch or Oreo but I have learned a lot from Charlie and Lucy.
When my moms' friends who have Charlie and Lucy and Butterscotch were here, I was really missing my moms. They had been gone for A REALLY LONG TIME even though my moms' friends said it had really only been 24 hours. 24 hours is three meals (assuming the first one occurs at the start of 24 hours), which is definitely A REALLY LONG TIME.
Desperate times called for desperate measures.
So I chewed on the hair of my moms' friend who has Charlie and Lucy, and I sat in the lap of my moms' friend who has Butterscotch.
It just wasn't the same.
My moms assure me that they were not actually gone for that long. My one mom, with the comfy lap, went away for three days, and my other mom, with the tasty hair, went away for three additional days. When I complained about their impending departure (I always know because of the SUITCASES ON THE BED), my moms were all WE ARE GOING TO YOUR GRANDPARENTS' TO EAT TURKEY and WE WILL BE BACK SOON and YOU WILL HAVE LOTS OF FUN VISITORS IN THE MEANTIME.
The part about the turkey bothered me for two reasons. First, I have turkey twice a day, every single day, and I only have to run back and forth between the bedroom and the kitchen a bunch of times for this to occur. I do not have to leave the house to eat turkey, so why would my moms have to leave the house to eat turkey? Second, my mom with the tasty hair DOES NOT EAT MEAT and so why would she leave the house for the express purpose of eating something she won't eat anyway?
I did, however, have lots of fun visitors. Some of my moms' friends came over the first night, and others came over the second night. On the first night it was my moms' friend who has Oreo and a whole bunch of other cats. On the second night it was my moms' friend who has Charlie and Lucy and another friend who has Butterscotch. I don't know Butterscotch or Oreo but I have learned a lot from Charlie and Lucy.
When my moms' friends who have Charlie and Lucy and Butterscotch were here, I was really missing my moms. They had been gone for A REALLY LONG TIME even though my moms' friends said it had really only been 24 hours. 24 hours is three meals (assuming the first one occurs at the start of 24 hours), which is definitely A REALLY LONG TIME.
Desperate times called for desperate measures.
So I chewed on the hair of my moms' friend who has Charlie and Lucy, and I sat in the lap of my moms' friend who has Butterscotch.
It just wasn't the same.
Labels: moms
